Don't want to give away all the surprises

The biggest crime you can commit around here, is to have an outdated Smartphone, that's Ok!!!

 

 When life gives you lemons, learn to sell someone his own shirt!

 

 The thing I hate about Christmas is that the gifts people give is the crap that they themselves don't want or like to have for themselves. Now, gag gifts are a different story; am I going to wear this t shirt that lights up in the dark that screams, "I am horny" puck yes!

 

 Around here, the minute a colleague coughs or sneezes one too many passes the 'God bless you' passage of endearment, the can of Lysol shows its ugly head and the pen filled sanitizer begins to make a wrong write. I am not going to lie, I am an obvious culprit of this self preservative act, but when the shoe is on the other foot, it feels nothing less than being a pariah.

 

Let me tell you something, you have got to watch when men put blinders on those coded nonchalant words. If a man says to me; I will sleep on rocks, chew rocks, and even rocket myself. Well, do I need a crystal ball to see if a California King sized bed is in our future?

 

Yes bwoy, mi dey yah! a day late and a dolla short!

 

 

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