The patient cleared his throat, took a deep breath, and began again. "You see, I haven't told anyone this, in fact I've had to lie about it...I- I've never been with a woman." The patient paused to let the information sink in
Despite his best efforts, Dr. Cynic's face contorted once, twice, and then, not able to contain himself any longer, burst out into vindictive hysterics, his entire face going red.
The patient looked like he might die from shame.
Dr. Cynic whistled loudly. "Wow! You've certainly taken your time about it! Oh, Jesus, oh," he paused to catch his breath from the uncontrollable laughter. "Another five years and you'll be the forty year old virgin, just like the movie! Ah, ha, ha, ha!"
The virgin patient scowled and walked out, slamming the door behind him. Dr. Cynic called after him, "Make sure no chicks trip over your dick, now, you player, you! Ah, ha, ha, ha!" Dr. Cynic wiped the tears from his face, blinked a few times, and muttered, "That guy needs help."