Don’t blame me, blame PMS that shit is real Garfield!

 

"Oh where

Oh where has my boyfriend gone,

Oh where, oh where can he be!"

Has anyone seen or heard from boyfriend in the last hour?

I am afraid he may have gone missing”

I have often heard and also repeated this statement “ A relation requires good excellent communication” I guess we need to talk about things and try not to wait until something goes horribly wrong before trying to fix it.

Hmmmm

We have our own personalities and we have to coexist in the same space. COEXISTING is very rewarding especially when it rains. It makes it easier to settle in for a early night’s sleep......

 

CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?

 

Let’s get back on track here.

Sometimes we pride ourselves as great communicators but when we begin to relate to others we suck at it. It gets worse if one person feels they are doing pretty good at communicating and the other is always the problem.

Some simple mistakes couples could be making in their relationships . 

 

Lip stick the problems being experienced

problem 1

“don’t worry we’ll figure something out” kiss

Next problem arises

“don’t worry we’ll figure something out” kiss

Now you have two(2) unsolved problems,

Next problem

“I said don’t worry we’ll figure something out”

.............................

Delaying a solution to a problem is a volcano waiting to erupt. If one party keeps applying a lip stick solution the results will cause further break down in the relationship. When there is a problem think of possible solutions. If at the time of discussion an amicable solutions can’t be made, ensure that as soon as possible it is done and each party is clear on the way forward.

 

Not saying what you really feel but what you feel the other person wants to hear

Being in love has some killer Chick V symptoms. Fever, high temperature and pain in the limbs, in this case the gut. Depending on the depth it can make you feel paralyzed from the heart down and you feel compelled to comply with the one you love so you keep your mouth shut and agree. Even if it may KILL YOU!

 

 

“Baby lets go sky diving off the cliff”

“sure” (trembling)

 

 

Learn to separate the two.. 1. You’re in love 2. You are a very important part of the relationship and you dont have to agree

Love doesn’t mean agreeing in a discussion it means connection. Connecting with someone who also make themselves available to also connect with you. Your thoughts and needs are just as important as the other person. SO speak up!

Bringing up past relationships and past problems in a bid to prove a point

It is hard to let go and even harder to forget past relationships however in order to give your new relationship a good shot at success you must forget, forgive and move on. You cannot keep comparing and reminding your new beau of what occurred in the past that is similar to the current relationship. Communication is good but not everything needs to be used to defend your line of reasoning. Agree on the current issues not the past. He or She is not your Ex they are your Present!

 

Unwillingness to compromise

Have you ever met someone who is set in their life style and would rather you change to fit in with them than for them to compromise and create a balance? I have and it can be the most frustrating of all relationships that failed. Everything is done on their timing like clockwork. Ease up you’re going to burn yourself out! Love you more, that’s all I am going to say about this one!

 

Expecting sighs and stares to be read by the other party (he or she is not a mind reader)

I am so guilty of this. I confess I was guilty of thinking my Dear Future Husband can read my mind.  Recently I had a stomach ache which lasted all night. The entire night I tossed and turned even bouncing him a few times. He got up in the night, turned on the bedside lamp and asked me if I was ok, I ignored. Few minutes after he hugged me and asked if I wanted a cup of tea I didn’t answer immediately but said NO, I was okay. WHY? Lets rewind to earlier that night.

I thought after seeing, feeling or hearing me tosses for hours (12:30am – 4:30am you should know I needed you to rub my tummy and also that I needed a cup of tea.

Why you should know this? Here are some of the things I did that night:-

 

 

 

 

I. I kicked you at least six (6) times while tossing.

2. I visited the bathroom at least three times and turned on the bright room light which you didn’t even bat an eyelid showing you were concerned

3. I sat up in bed countless times “GROANING” “LOUDLY” yet you kept sleeping like a baby

Then after I got tired of trying to get your attention and tried to ignore my pain you’re going to ask me at 4:30a.m in the morning if I want a cup of tea and if I want you to rub my tummy.. NOPE.

By 6am I realized that once again I was upset with you over something you were not aware of. (I felt so ashamed). You got in late from work that night after having another challenging day which I was aware of. Even though you were tired you still took me out to dinner  and we had a great time before we retreated to bed.

 

 

SO

You cannot read my mind , I now know acknowledge this and for that I openly seek an apology. I promise to try harder to remember no one can read minds; not even my Future Husband.

..........................

Couples, speak your mind, tell the other party what you would like them to do to assist. Don't ever assume they already know after all a relationship consist of two persons with two different personalities who should be able to maintain their own individuality without compromising too much in a relationship.